Why are wives more dangerous than the Mafia?
The mafia wants either ur money or life...
The wives want both!
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Marriage is like a public toilet Those waiting outside are desperate to get in & Those inside are desperate to come out.
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No Man Can Ever Be Satisfied
with 4 things in life.
(1) Mobile
(2) Automobile
(3) TV
(4) Wife
Because there is always a better model in neighborhood.
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Searching these keywords on Google `How to tackle wife?`
Google search result, `Good day sir, Even we are searching`.
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Compromising does not mean you are wrong and your wife is right.
It only means that the safety of your head is much more important than your ego!
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Imagine living with 3 wives in one compound and never leaving the house for 5 years.
Osama Bin Laden must have called the US Navy Seals himself!
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Whisky is a brilliant invention. One double and you start feeling single again.
===
A friend recently explained why he refuses to get to married.
He says the wedding rings look like miniature handcuffs.
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It takes thousand workers 2 build a castle, Million soldiers to protect a country,
but just One woman 2 make a Happy Home --------- A Good Maid!
===
Funny quote on a husband`s T-Shirt:
All girls are devils,
but my wife is the queen
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of them
Opportunity dances with those who are already on the dance floor.
Saturday 25 June 2011
WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A North Indian GIRL as WIFE
*** WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A North Indian GIRL as WIFE ***
1. At the time of marriage, a north Indian girl has more boyfriends than her age.
2. Before marriage, she looks almost like a bollywood heroine and after marriage you have to go around her twice to completely hug her.
3. By the time she professes her undevoted love to you, you are bankrupt because of the number of times you had to take her out to movies, theatres and restaurants. And you wait longingly for her dowry.
4. The only dishes she can think of to cook is paneer butter masala, aloo sabji, aloo gobi sabji, aloo matar, aloo paneer, that after eating all those paneer and aloos you are either in the bed with chronic cholestrol or chronic gas disorder.
5. The only growth that you see later in your career is the rise in your monthly phone bill.
6. You are blinded by her love that you think that she is a blonde. Only later do you come to know that it is because of the mehandhi that she applies to cover her grey hair.
7. When you come home from office she is very busy watching "Kyonki saas bhi kabi bahu thi" that you either end up eating outside or cooking yourself.
8. You are a very "ESpecial" person to her.
9. She always thought that Madras is a state and covers the whole of south india until she met you.
10. When she says she is going to "work out" she means she is going to " walk out"
11. She has greater number of relatives than the number of people you have in your home town.
12. The only two sentences in English that she knows are "Thank you" and "How are you"
*** WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A South Indian GIRL as WIFE ***
1.Her mother looks down at you because you didn't study in IIT or Madras / Anna University .
2. Her father starts or ends every conversation with " ... I say..."
3. She shudders if you use four letter words.
4. She has long hair, neatly oiled and braided (The Dubai based Oil Well Company will negotiate with her on a 25 year contract to extract coconut oil from her hair.)
5. She uses the word 'Super' as her only superlative.
6. Her name is another name for a Goddess or a flower.
7. Her first name is longer than your first name, middle name and surname combined (unless you are from Andhra)
8. When she mixes milk/curd and rice you are never sure whether it is for the dog or for herself.
9. For weddings, she sports a mini jasmine garden on her head and wears silk saris in the Madras heat without looking too uncomfortable while you are melting in your singlet.
10. Her favourite cricketer is Krishnamachari Srikkanth.
11. Her favourite food is dosa though she has tried North Indian snacks like Chats (pronounced like the slang for 'conversation' )
12. She bores you by telling you which raaga each song you hear is based on.
13. You have to give her jewellery, though she has already got plenty of it ..
14. Her Mangal Sutra weighs more than the championship belts worn by WWF wrestlers.
15. Her father thinks she is much smarter than you.
1. At the time of marriage, a north Indian girl has more boyfriends than her age.
2. Before marriage, she looks almost like a bollywood heroine and after marriage you have to go around her twice to completely hug her.
3. By the time she professes her undevoted love to you, you are bankrupt because of the number of times you had to take her out to movies, theatres and restaurants. And you wait longingly for her dowry.
4. The only dishes she can think of to cook is paneer butter masala, aloo sabji, aloo gobi sabji, aloo matar, aloo paneer, that after eating all those paneer and aloos you are either in the bed with chronic cholestrol or chronic gas disorder.
5. The only growth that you see later in your career is the rise in your monthly phone bill.
6. You are blinded by her love that you think that she is a blonde. Only later do you come to know that it is because of the mehandhi that she applies to cover her grey hair.
7. When you come home from office she is very busy watching "Kyonki saas bhi kabi bahu thi" that you either end up eating outside or cooking yourself.
8. You are a very "ESpecial" person to her.
9. She always thought that Madras is a state and covers the whole of south india until she met you.
10. When she says she is going to "work out" she means she is going to " walk out"
11. She has greater number of relatives than the number of people you have in your home town.
12. The only two sentences in English that she knows are "Thank you" and "How are you"
*** WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A South Indian GIRL as WIFE ***
1.Her mother looks down at you because you didn't study in IIT or Madras / Anna University .
2. Her father starts or ends every conversation with " ... I say..."
3. She shudders if you use four letter words.
4. She has long hair, neatly oiled and braided (The Dubai based Oil Well Company will negotiate with her on a 25 year contract to extract coconut oil from her hair.)
5. She uses the word 'Super' as her only superlative.
6. Her name is another name for a Goddess or a flower.
7. Her first name is longer than your first name, middle name and surname combined (unless you are from Andhra)
8. When she mixes milk/curd and rice you are never sure whether it is for the dog or for herself.
9. For weddings, she sports a mini jasmine garden on her head and wears silk saris in the Madras heat without looking too uncomfortable while you are melting in your singlet.
10. Her favourite cricketer is Krishnamachari Srikkanth.
11. Her favourite food is dosa though she has tried North Indian snacks like Chats (pronounced like the slang for 'conversation' )
12. She bores you by telling you which raaga each song you hear is based on.
13. You have to give her jewellery, though she has already got plenty of it ..
14. Her Mangal Sutra weighs more than the championship belts worn by WWF wrestlers.
15. Her father thinks she is much smarter than you.
Wednesday 22 June 2011
10+ Coolest Upcoming Gadgets of 2011
1) Google Nexus 3:
Google's Nexus is a speedy smart phone. It's a intuitive handset having five customizable home screens with animated backgrounds. It also provides slick speech recognition capabilities. Nexus is now integrated with most of the software services provided by Google. Nexus One represent itself as a search giant's first expansion in the world of e- commerce and hardware. Although that some well-publicized customer service issues come up with the device, still it remains among those ionic customer electronics which are at top of the list throughout the year.
2) RIM BlackBerry Presenter
As many of you have already noticed that micro and mini projectors will be available soon. Manufactures like 3M, Microvision and other. Thank God this handy 3.4-inch x 2.4-inch boxlike accessory is designed, so that it can be used with BlackBerry smart phones. It is very simple in use. What you have to do is that, simply connect it with a projector or monitor and you can use Blutetooth connectivity in order to display Microsoft PowerPoint 2003 and 2007 slides directly from your handset. You can pause images, set slides to automatically swap at prearranged intervals and in this way you can enjoy the benefit of accurate reproductions with most visual and animated effects.
3) PlayStation Phone by Sony
Sony, the leader of innovative technologies is ready to launch playstation phone code named "Zeus" in early 2011. Zeus would have Andriod 3.0 Gingerbread operating system. It also contains SD slot card having 8GB of memory with 1GHz Qualcomm MSM8655 processor. It comes up with 3.8 display and graphics processing unit of Adreno 205. This superb phone also contains 1GB ROM and 512 MB RAM. 3.8″ touch screen and its touch pad is just like gaming console of PSP. Through PlayStation Phone you can also download different games. So for those who love games, it is going to be a best product.
4) 3D Vaio by Sony
In order to be synchronize with BRAVIA glasses 3D laptop computer by Sony will boast of IR blaster. Lodged in F series chassis, the laptop contains display of 16", so it can also be used for PS3. For games and videos, this laptop comes up with 1080p 240fps display. You can upgrade it from 2D to 3D with Blu-ray drives. In order to retain crystal clear picture quality, 3D VAIO uses the same technology in BRAVIA TV, with Black Frame Insertion. 3D VAIO used sequential technology for HD display while utilizing shutter glass. With just one touch button you can change between 2D to 3D. So, 3D VAIO would be a 0utstanding electronic gadget of 2011.
5) Apple iPhone 5
Apple iPhone 5 is based on face recognition mechanism with a sleek design. It contains 64GB memory with OLED screen. With GPS navigation feature you are able to synchronize with iTunes and customize SMS alerts and tones with HD audio quality. With Apple iPhone5 you can do video chat on 3G. For more durability, the screen is made scratch protected. For improved resolution it contains the most advanced graphic chips in it with chips dual core processors. On iPhone 5 you are also able to watch local channels. It also includes Pico projector which is used for presentation on a wall or flat surface.
6) PlayBook by BlackBerry
With simplified and advanced operating system BlackBerry is going to launch PlayBook. It would be highly compatible with current web requirements such like HTML5. This BlackBerry Tablet Operating System also called as QNX, supports open GL and PSIX. It will also be compatible with Adobe AIR and Flash 10.1. It comes up with 1GHZ processor, 1GB of Ram, 3MP camera with 5MP lens and 1024X600, 7″ display. Playbook offer video conferencing and features micro USB jack, 1080p resolution, Wi-Fi, HDMI port and Blue Tooth. Playbook is hardly just 0.4" thick and approximately weighs just 450 grams. It is possible to extract the data out of BlackBerry on PlayBook with the help of BlueTooth tethering application.
7) 3DS by Nintendo
The Nintendo 3D comes up with 2 outward lenses and 1 inward lense for taking pictures and it is compatible with 3D graphics sans glasses. With outward lens you can take picture of any person and at the same instant the user's picture can be taken with the inward lens. It is possible to combine two images and produce a single one. Users cartoon avatars automatically created by 3DS. It also enables users of 2DS for communication. With the help of tag mode, you are able to get the details of another user of 3DS, like you can come to know about the games he or she played last.
Samsung LED 9000 Series
Samsung's LED 9000 series of television sets is pencil-thin. Yes it's just 0.3 inches wide and it can support and having the great ability to display 3D images and can convert 2D content into third dimension. You must be impressed by knowing that it can offer great support for downloadable apps, just like you'd find on the iPhone or Nexus One. Its application served via open development platform which means that any entrepreneur is able to insert content in it and can add up huge functionality, from the world of social networking clients to the downloadable games.
10) Palm Pre Plus
With minor changes in hardware the newer version of palm pre comes up with patch up keyboard and some little changes in user interface. It contains 3.1 inch multi touch screen with 320×480 resolution with HVGA display. In order to capture amateur video capture, it contains 3MP camera with LED flash. Palm Pre Plus will be coming up with Verizon. It runs on WebOS in its smartphone platform, which gives applications like Hotspot Tethering. You can get Palm Pre Plus for just 150 $ with two years Verizon contacts with their data plans.
11) Lenovo IdeaPad U1
Lenovo IdeaPad U1 is a 1.6 inch Linux based PC. It can also become a fully functional 3.7lb notebook having multi-touch capabilities that boasts an Intel Core 2 Duo processor. This device really functions well while offering solid five hours of battery life. E-mail and other web surfing facilities are also available. It attracts to those mobile professionals who are looking for great diversity in computing solution. So you can call it as two for one deal.
Wednesday 15 June 2011
Top Entertaining Websites
| Rank | #1 | #2 | #3 | #4 | #5 | #6 | #7 | #8 | #9 | #10 |
 Excellent Very Good Good Fair Poor | I Am Bored | Miniclip | Guinness World Records | Google Video | Stupid Videos | eBaum's WORLD | Tea Games | Coffee Break Arcade | Holy Lemon | Free Addicting Games |
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| Reviewer Comments |  | | | | | | | | | |
| Rank | #11 | #12 | #13 | #14 | #15 | |||||
| Excellent Very Good Good Fair Poor | Addicting Games | Bored | Kill Some Time | Break | Cool Buddy | |||||
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| Reviewer Comments | | | | | |
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